Singing Your Song

As a board-certified music therapist (MT-BC), I have seen how music from a person’s young adult years can provide orientation to the present moment in spite of Alzheimer’s or stroke.

Mother and child playing piano together at home, sharing a love for singing their song.

~~~Written By Amy Wilson

The first time I met Bill, I stood on the steps of a stately white home taking deep breaths to calm my racing heart before pushing the doorbell. What could I possibly offer a highly successful, well-connected man suffering from a rare neurological condition? Facts from journal articles and textbooks bounced around in my thoughts as I waited for someone to answer the door. 

What Can Music Do?

As a board-certified music therapist (MT-BC), I have seen how music from a person’s young adult years can provide orientation to the present moment in spite of Alzheimer’s or stroke (Gomez & Gomez, 2017). Intense pleasure responses to music can excite pathways in the brain involved in motivation (Zatorre & Salimpoor, 2013; Stegemöller, 2014). Preferred music can focus and sustain attention resulting in lower pain perception and increased relaxation (Bradt et al., 2021; Hirokiwa & Ohira, 2003; Lee, 2016)

But Bill did not need theories or statistics. He needed me to see him as a whole person through the music he loved. Over the course of many weeks as he received hospice care, I learned his favorite Irish tunes and sang Sinatra classics like, “New York, New York,” as Bob’s wife held his hand and recalled trips they had enjoyed together.

Amal spoke softly, thanking me for the smallest of kindnesses. I met him while working in behavioral health. His features remained calm and his voice low and steady. He recognized his situation and problems as he worked through the evils of a childhood in the Sudan. One afternoon I noticed how his body relaxed as I improvised music on the keyboard, so I continued playing as he and the other group members sat quietly with closed eyes. As he slowly emerged, Amal said the music brought him to a place of peace.

A Connection To God

Then there was Hannah, who two minutes into an assessment said, “I don’t want to answer any more of your #@$%* questions!” I received her message clearly. A week later, she was in my group requesting “This Little Light” and writing a beautiful song about finding strength in God and prayer. Initially I thought she was mocking the exercise. But as I was leaving that day, she stopped me and said, “When I came here, I was really high on drugs. I’m doing better now, and I really enjoyed your music group. Thank you.”

One morning, I led a group on the behavioral health unit in activities to encourage spiritual wellness. I had no idea how people would respond, and fully expected them to tell me this was stupid or to simply walk out. After many years as a worship leader and hospice music therapist, I know the power music holds for our faith and connection to God. But I did not know how people suffering from acute psychiatric symptoms would receive spiritual support. 

I created a group session that was patient-led and allowed them to choose spiritual or gospel songs they found meaningful. There were eight men in the group, including several who exhibited disorganized thoughts and behaviors, often speaking in disjointed words that were hardly understandable. These men chose songs like “What a Wonderful World,” singing every word clearly. Near the end of the group, a young man I had not yet met requested “Amazing Grace.” 

I  never sing this song without a request, as it can hold strong memories of funerals and loss. I asked everyone present if they wanted to sing it, and they all affirmed the choice. These men sang “Amazing Grace” with more conviction than I have ever seen in 20 years of worship leading. I have become very good at “bracketing” my own feelings when working, but this caught me off guard, especially “I once was lost, but now I’m found.” No matter their past or future, in that moment these men were clearly connecting with God and with one another.

When I first started working in behavioral health, it seemed to hold no similarities to hospice work. Now I think that in a spiritual sense, these two environments have much in common. The people I meet are often facing the most intense period of physical, emotional, psychological, and relational hardship they have ever endured. Perhaps because of their desperation, many of the people receiving care are open to God and recognize their deep need for him. With the simple offering of an acoustic guitar and my voice, I can share the light of Christ through music that reaches the soul.

A Source Of Healing

1 Samuel 16 tells the story of Saul in one of his darkest seasons. This story first captivated me as a middle schooler. How could it be that of all things, music is prescribed to ease Saul’s torment? Saul’s servants seem confident that beautiful music will relieve his suffering (I Samuel 16:16). Indeed, when David is found and plays his instrument for the king, Saul is “refreshed.” What exactly was the nature of Saul’s torment? Did he perhaps have a form of mental illness, or was the suffering entirely spiritual? A few details interest me. The healing Saul received did not occur in isolation, but in the context of a caring relationship. The illness or spiritual suffering was not a one-time event, but recurred. David played the lyre skillfully. He practiced his craft over time and the work of his hands was used to comfort. And the people of this ancient time expected music would provide the “cure.” Maybe they understood more fully how music reaches the whole person’s mind, body, and soul than we do in our modern thinking.

As a music therapist, I have the honor and privilege to know patients by their music. Songs connect us and build lasting memories. I witness restoration in the places where beauty meets brokenness. After studying music as a performer and music therapist for most of my life, I am increasingly amazed by this gift God has given us. Music can calm an infant, begin a teenage romance, inspire a team, tear down walls, unify a nation, share ideas, tell stories, and allow us to worship the Lord of All. May we give thanks for this good gift and use it to “build one another up” (1 Thessalonians 5:11).

Amy Wilson, MA, MT-BC is a board certified music therapist who regularly leads worship at our Leawood Campus. Amy and her family have attended Christ Community since 2012. She is currently a doctoral student at the University of Kansas and works in behavioral health. 

~~~~~

Names and details have been changed to protect confidentiality.

For more information about music therapy, please visit musictherapy.org

RELATED RESOURCES: 
For additional information listen to theFormed.life podcast (links below)
Episode 19: Exploring the Profound Impact of Music Therapy with Amy Wilson or Episode 20: A Body of Praise with W. David O. Taylor. Taylor highlights the significance of the physical body in our worship of God. 


CITATIONS:

Bradt, J., Dileo, C., Myers-Coffman, K., & Biondo, J. (2021). Music interventions for improving psychological and physical outcomes in people with cancer. The Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews, 10(10), CD006911.

Gomez, G. M., & Gomez, G. J. (2017). Music therapy and Alzheimer’s Disease: Cognitive, psychological, and behavioral effects. Neurologia, 32(5): 300-308.

Hirokiwa, E., & Ohira, H. (2003). The effects of music listening after a stressful task on immune functions, neuroendocrine responses, and emotional states in college students. Journal of Music Therapy, 40(3), 189-211. 

Lee, J. H. (2016). The effects of music on pain: A meta-analysis. Journal of Music Therapy, 53(4), 430-477.

Stegemöller, E. L. (2014). Exploring a Neuroplasticity Model for Music Therapy. Journal of Music Therapy, 51(3), 211-227.

Zatorre, R. & Salimpoor, V. (2013). From perception to pleasure: music and its neural substrates. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences – PNAS 110(2), p. 10430-10437 

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Sex and Sexuality (Students)

Sex: It’s Worth Waiting For by Greg Speck
Greg Speck has been doing youth ministry for more than 30 years and has a remarkable ability to connect with students on difficult topics in ways that are relevant and helpful. This is a great read for any teenager who has questions about sex.

Sex Has a Price Tag: Discussions About Sexuality, Spirituality and Self Respect by Pam Stenzel
Pam Stenzel is not shy about the subject of teenage sexuality. She is very blunt, but also very clear. This book is addressed to both boys and girls. You will find personal testimonies, medical stats and practical solutions in this book.

Pure Eyes: A Man’s Guide to Sexual Integrity by Craig Gross and Steven Luff
Craig Gross is the founder of XXXChurch, which is a ministry to people who struggle with pornography and sex addiction, as well as to people in the sex industry. This is a great book designed for men and the struggles they face to maintain sexual purity.

Pure Heart: A Woman’s Guide to Sexual Integrity by Shellie Warren
This is an official resource of XXXChurch and is the female counterpart to Pure Eyes. This book addresses real and honest issues that women face in regards to sexual temptation and maintaining sexual purity.

Sex, Dating and Relationships by Gerald Hiestand
You will find some very clear, practical, and more importantly biblical wisdom in this book. This may be a great book for students and parents to read through together.

Washed and Waiting: Reflections on Christian Faithfulness and Homosexuality by Wesley Hill
The subject of homosexuality is increasingly a significant topic of conversation. With so many voices and opinions on the issue out there, Wesley Hill (a gay Christian) provides some helpful words on how the church can begin to think and talk about it in ways that are both faithful to scripture and helpful to those with questions and struggles.

Sex and Sexuality (Parents)

Hooked: New Science on How Casual Sex Is Affecting Our Children by Joe McIlhaney Jr., and Freda McKissic Bush.
This is one of the best book we have read, thus far, on the subject of sexuality and adolescence. It is a well-researched book that is very accessible for both teens and adults. We have found it very insightful and would strongly recommend you read this book.

So Sexy So Soon: The New Sexualized Childhood and What Parents Can do to Protect Their Kids by Diane E. Levin and Jean Kilbourne
A fabulous commentary on the over-sexualized culture that our children are growing up in and how it is impacting their sexual development. While it is a great book on how to talk to your children about sex, there is a great deal on practical information for parents on how to guide and protect their children in a sex-saturated culture.

Real Sex: The Naked Truth about Chastity by Lauren Winner
This is a phenomenal book for both parents and older teenagers. It approaches the subject of sex in a much more holistic sense, as well as in a communal sense.

Wired for Intimacy: How Pornography Hijacks the Male Brain by William Struthers
While this may not be all that helpful for teenagers, it is a great resource on understanding how pornography hijacks our brain and distorts the way we think about sex.

Teaching Your Child Healthy Sexuality: A Biblical Approach to Prepare Them for Life by Jim Burns
This book is similar to The Purity Code, but addresses you, as the parent, giving valuable ideas on how to address some of the biggest sexual issues our teenagers are facing today.

Sex, Dating and Relationships by Gerald Hiestand
You will find some very clear, practical, and more importantly biblical wisdom in this book. This may be a great book for students and parents to read through together.

Washed and Waiting: Reflections on Christian Faithfulness and Homosexuality by Wesley Hill
The subject of homosexuality is increasingly a significant topic of conversation. With so many voices and opinions on the issue out there, Wesley Hill (a gay Christian) provides some helpful words on how the church can begin to think and talk about it in ways that are both faithful to scripture and helpful to those with questions and struggles.

Sex and Sexuality (Online Resources)

purelifeministries.org
Founded by a former sex addict and his wife, this ministry offers articles and resources for those who struggle with sexual sin and for spouses of those who struggle.

xxxchurch.com
One of the leading resources in helping men and women fight the battle for their sexual purity, XXX Church offers resources, blogs, videos and confessional opportunities for men and women struggling with sexual sin. Also, they feature a section for those dealing with the repercussions of their spouse’s sin.

fightthenewdrug.org
Fight the New Drug’s message is based on science and facts. In a sense, science is an international currency. They explain why porn is harmful by educating people about the negative psychological and physical reactions it causes.

Student Development (Students)

Can I Ask That? Volume 1 (Student Guide) by Jim Candy, Brad M. Griffin, and Kara Powell

Can I Ask That? Volume 2 (Student Guide) by Jim Candy, Brad M. Griffin, and Kara Powell

New City Catechism by Tim Keller

Just Do Something: A Liberating Approach to Finding God’s Will by Kevin DeYoung

Called: The Crisis and Promise of Following Jesus Today by Mark Labberton

Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Before You Go: Following Jesus and Growing in Your Faith After High School by Gerald Fadayomi

Student Development (Parents)

Growing With: Every Parent’s Guide to Helping Teenagers and Young Adults Thrive in Their Faith, Family, and Future by Kara Powell and Steven Argue

The Teenage Brain: A Neuroscientist’s Survival Guide to Raising Adolescents and Young Adults by Frances E. Jensen

Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain by Daniel J. Siegel

Understanding Your Young Teen: Practical Wisdom for Parents by Mark Oestreicher

Parenting Beyond Your Capacity: Connect Your Family to a Wider Community by Reggie Joiner and Carey Nieuhof

Websites

Center for Parent and Youth Understanding

Digital Kids Initiative

Fuller Youth Institute

HomeWord

Books

Sticky Faith by Chap Clark and Kara Powell

Sticky Faith Guide for Your Family by Kara Powell

Like Dew Your Youth by Eugene Peterson

Give Them Grace by Elyse Fitzpatrick

Age of Opportunity by Paul Tripp

The Space Between by Walt Mueller

How to Talk to Your Child about Communion

At Christ Community, we believe communion is one of two sacraments of the church, with baptism being the other. A sacrament is a directive, something you do because someone told you to do it or a command. Communion is a sacrament because Jesus commanded the church to practice it. Communion is a ceremony the church observes and practices as a sign of the grace God has shown to each of us. Communion is a way for those who have experienced the saving grace of Jesus to remember and celebrate what Jesus did when He died on the cross, and God raised Him from the dead.

When do I talk to my child about Communion?

Children are naturally curious and commonly ask questions about communion. If your family is involved at church, they may start asking these questions at a really young age. If the question is asked, it is the time to talk about communion.

Questions Kids Might Ask & How You Might Respond

WHAT is Communion?

Communion is for people who have made the choice to live their lives for Jesus and follow Him. They will eat small pieces of bread to remember Jesus’ body, which was broken because of His love for us. They will also drink juice to remember Jesus bled because of His love for us. Communion has other names. Sometimes communion is called the Lord’s Supper and communion can also be called the Eucharist, which means giving thanks.

WHY do we take Communion?

Communion is our way of remembering the last supper Jesus had with the disciples before He was arrested. That is why it is sometimes called the Lord’s Supper. The story about this meal with Jesus and the disciples is found in Matthew 26:17-30, Mark 14:12-26, Luke 22:7-23, and 1 Corinthians 11:23-26.Jesus said some very important words to His disciples during this meal. He said “Do this in remembrance of Me.” (Luke 22:19, 1 Corinthians 11:24-25). We include communion in our worship service as a special way to remember who Jesus is and what He did for each of us.1 Corinthians 11:26 says, “For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord’s death until he comes.” When we take communion, we are reminded of Jesus’ death and we’re able to thank Jesus for sacrificing His life for ours on the cross.

WHO should take Communion?

People who are part of God’s family, and have asked Jesus to forgive their sins, are invited to participate in communion. Participating in the holy sacrament of communion reflects living lives of worship and obedience to God.How do you become a part of God’s family? You pray and surrender your entire life to Jesus and ask God to forgive you of your sins. The Holy Spirit gives you strength and wisdom to obey.

NEXT STEPS:

Each Christ Community campus has resources available to help guide your conversation with your children about Communion. If you feel your child is ready for more, please contact your Children’s or Student Pastor.

SEXUALITY

God Made All of Me! Justin and Lindsey Holcomb
God Made Boys and Girls: Helping Children Understand the Gift of Gender Marty Machowski
God Made Your Body Jim Burns
How God Makes Babies Jim Burns
Teaching Your Children Healthy Sexuality: A Biblical Approach to Prepare Them for Life Jim Burns

GRIEF / DEATH

Goodbye to Goodbyes Tales That Tell the Truth Lauren Chandler and Catalina Echeverri
Someone I Love Died Christine Harder Tangvald

IDENTITY

When God Made You Matthew Paul Turner
When God Made You Jane G. Meyer
The Gospel In Color – For Kids: A Theology of Racial
Reconciliation for Kids Curtis A. Woods, Jarvis J. Williams, Pip Craighead, Rommel Ruiz
God Made Me AND You: Celebrating God’s Design for Ethnic Diversity Shai Linne, Trish Mahoney
God’s Very Good Idea: A True Story of God’s Delightfully Different Family Trillia Newbell, Catalina Echeverri

ANXIETY / FEAR

It Will be Okay: Trusting God Through Fear and Change Lysa TerKeurst
Hey Warrior Karen Young
Zoe’s Hiding Place David Powlison

ADVENT / CHRISTMAS

Unto Us Family Worship Guide Doorposts Music
Advent Storybook Laura Richie
The Christmas Story Autumn Ward Preschool
The Advent Storybook: 25 Bible Stories Showing Why Jesus Came Laura Richie and Ian Dale
The Christmas Promise Alison Mitchell, Catalina Echeverri
Song of the Stars: A Christmas Story Sally Lloyd Jones

EASTER

The Garden, The Curtain, The Cross Carl Laferton
The Easter Story Patricia A Pingry Preschool
The Story of the Easter Robin Dandi Daley MacKall Preschool
The Easter Story Autumn Ward Preschool
Holy Week: An Emotions Primer Danielle Hitchen and Jessica Blanchard Preschool
Benjamin’s Box: The Story of the Resurrection Eggs
The Story of the Resurrection Eggs Melody Carlson and Jack Stockman
Easter Love Letters from God

BIBLE GOSPEL STORY

3-1 A Picture of God Joanne Marxhausen
Action Bible Sergio Cariello
The Biggest Story Kevin DeYoung
The Read-Aloud Book of Bible Stories Amy Steedman
The Story of God’s Love for You Sally Lloyd-Jones

DEVOTIONAL BOOKS

Thoughts that Make Your Heart Sing Sally Lloyd- Jones
The Radical Book for Kids George Thornton
Bible Infographics Harvest Kids
Notes from JesuMikal Keefer
I Am: Names of God Diane Stortz
The Case for Christ for Kids Book Series Lee Strobel
Indescribable: 100 Devotions for Kids About God and Science Louie Giglio
Exploring Grace Together: 40 Devotionals for the Family Jessica Thompson and Elyse M. Fitzpatrick

GENERAL

Lord’s Prayer Cards She Reads Truth
Praying in Color Sybil MacBeth
The Ology Marty Machowski
I Will Thank You! Kids Read Truth, guided journal, scripture, and art

BIBLE GOSPEL STORY

The Big God Story – Michelle Anthony
Images of God Marie – Hélène Delval
Everything A Child Should Know About God – Kenneth N. Taylor
Jesus Storybook – Sally Lloyd- Jones
WOW! The Good News in Four Words – Dandi Daley Mackall
God’s Very Good Idea – Trillia Newbell
I Am: The Names of God for Little Ones – Diane Stortz
The Storm That Stopped – Alison Mitchell
Goodbye to Goodbyes – Lauren Chandler
The Friend Who Forgives – Dan DeWitt
When I Pray for You Matthew – Paul Turner
The One O’Clock Miracle – Alison Mitchell
The Read-Aloud Bible Stories – Ella K. Lindvall
Loved: The Lord’s Prayer – Sally Lloyd Jones
The Beginner’s Gospel Story Bible – Jared Kennedy, Trish Mahoney

GENERAL

The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies
to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind
 – Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson

General Parenting

The Look and Tell Bible – Thomas Nelson
God Bless You & Goodnight – Hannah Hall
Who Sang the First Song? – Ellie Holcomb
You Are – Emil Assell
Tonight – Emily Assell
The Read-Aloud Bible Storie– Ella K. Lindvall
Loved: The Lord’s Prayer – Sally Lloyd Jones
The Biggest Story ABC – Kevin DeYoung and Don Clark

General Parenting

Spiritual Parenting – Michelle Anthony
Don’t Miss It – Reggie Joiner and Kristen Ivy
Mom Set Free – Jeannie Cunnion
Bible Praying for Parents – Keith Ferrin
Kids Can! – Leah Archibald
Faith begins at Home – Mark Holmen
Grace Based Parenting – Dr. Tim Kimmel
Pass It On – Jim Burns and Jeremy Lee
Faithful Families – Creating Sacred Moments at Home – Traci Smith
Becoming a Spiritually Healthy Family – Michelle Anthony
Faith Conversations for Families – Jim Burns
The Sticky Faith Guide For Your Family – Dr. Kara Powell
Parenting: 14 Gospel Principles That Can Radically Change Your Family – Paul David Tripp
Handfree Mama: A Guide to Putting Down the Phone, Burning the To-Do List, and Letting Go of
Perfection to Grasp What Really Matters! – Rachel Stafford
Raising Grateful Kids in an Ungrateful World – Kristen Welch

PLAN A VISIT
Christ Community Church exterior with stone facade and tall steeple.
Brookside Campus
  • 400 W 67th Street
    Kansas City, MO 64113
Service Time
  • Sunday 9:00 & 10:45 AM
Christ Community Church building in Kansas City. New Home.
Downtown Campus
  • 208 W 19th Street
    Kansas City, MO 64108
Service Time
  • Sunday 9:00 & 10:45 AM
Christ Community Church building with a green roof and brick facade on a sunny day.
Leawood Campus
  • 14200 Kenneth Road
    Leawood, KS 66224
Service Time
  • Sunday 9:00 & 10:30 AM
Christ Community Church Olathe Campus with sign. "Christ Community 20600 Olathe Campus
Olathe Campus
  • 20600 W 119th Street

    Olathe, KS 66061
Service Time
  • Sunday 9:00 & 10:30 AM
Christ Community Church building exterior with modern architecture and a prominent cross.
Shawnee Campus
  • 13330 W 62nd Terrace

    Shawnee, KS 66216
Service Time
  • Sunday 9:00 & 10:45 AM